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The '''Jonas Brothers''' are faggots who think they are a band that would make anyone with a brain want to forcefully disembowel and strangle every teenybopping Jonas fan they see. They are a bunch of incestuous cunts that make money doing absolutely nothing. They make more money taking pictures and appearing on TV than selling CD's. They make the world a better place with their completely amazing, life-affirming music and (complete lack of) musicianship. The Jonas Brothers have been known to have buttsecks with each other frequently. This behavior is believed to be rooted in their father's many massive rapes while their sick fuck mother watched and masturbated. They also took up a promise to not have sex until marriage which is an insult to real musicians since the beginning of time. With this extra time on their hands, they spend a shitload of undeserved cash on mansions, boats, cars, and black dildos. This gives trolls an abundance of ammunition in their quest for lulz.
The Jonas Brothers are universally hated by those with functioning minds for making perfectly good instruments look gay and showcasing their complete lack of any discernible musical talent. Some fans even go so far as claiming that they are the second coming of Jesus, and that their music should be classified as Classic Rock; which goes to show just how fucking retarded today's generation is. This proves that parents don't care about how their children are growing up, and that they don't beat the living shit out of their children nearly enough. Unfortunately, the Brothers are so protected by the Disney Channel that all the trolling in the world couldn't possibly lead them to playing the shotgun mouthwash card.

Revision as of 03:47, December 20, 2009

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